Wednesday, 18 December 2013

Do you telephone people less than you use to?


Michael posted this question in Facebook, as you can see.
My response was as follows:

The HR guy,  where I used to work, talking about email, ten+ years ago, was telling me that he thought informal communication was suffering badly.
In that respect email has transitioned into Social Media and has improved again.
I have great friends that I have never met!

I think the phone as a verbal device, is now the casualty.
The phone is now the 'Smart'phone which is predominantly a non verbal device but it is dominating communication.
It will be interesting to see how that will swing back.

'Swings and Roundabouts'


That’s how it occurs to me.
What do you think?

Tuesday, 3 December 2013

Musical Motivation

I was just listening to Kiki Dee 'Loving and Free' from her Amoureuse album.

Isn't wonderful how music can remind us of forgotten or significant times ?
Each is times-tamped within us and it always seems to show up when it is most needed.


This track was significant to me when I was having a tough time emotionally as a young adult – I was , truth be known, lonely and scared about that.

The fabulous words to this song took me onto something else in my life. They motivated me and I didn’t realise it at the time.
I have never been lonely since and I rarely experience being scared as a bad thing, more so a motivator

NLP Practitioners' will recognise that as an Anchor.
Tunes like this and Pick Up The Pieces by the Average White Band (My waiting in Queues enjoying time anchor) are my Ear Worms

Bound, I am bound, like a knot on a string
Eager to be where my life can begin
Out of the shadow and into the sun
So many things that I should have done

I will untangle myself, so that I can see
I will untangle myself, everything will be
Loving and free

Bound I am bound, like a rope on a swing
Up in the air and then down again
Sure for the first time so clear in my mind
Wise to the feeling I gently unwind

Which music or tunes have driven you to a new experience?

Sources You and

Friday, 11 October 2013

The On Side as a Rule


I loved listening to Matt Kendall speak, the other night.
A man after my on heart!

I think of goals like Football Goals - fixed, solid and every chance of missing them usually resulting in stoppage time.
i.e. The game (life) requires minimal down time in my opinion

It is better to focus on your actions, skills and behaviour and bend it like Beckham
Its all about what you do, rather than what you plan

  • JFDI!
  • notice how good it feels and
  • see what else you can do

As Landmark Education say:
SatisfACTION comes from being in action

 Thumbs up

Wednesday, 7 August 2013

Something and Nothing

My FB Friend Mott posted a great picture today!


and as you can see, I couldn’t resist adding something!

Nothing really is everything and everything consists of nothing

It only becomes something once we make it into Something by adding a meaning or a logic or a thought and that is where the trouble can start.
When no..thing means some..thing it can change lives for good and from my experience, largely bad.

People kill to maintain their beliefs and values (that's something constructed out of nothing)
People kill at the behest of governments or religion or corporations, to maintain their beliefs, values and missions (that's something else that's been constructed)
People can suffer, in particular Children, because people add meanings to events and situations (there’s something mean there)

When I coach and even when I am teaching NLP, I spend a lot of time dealing with peoples’ something and converting it into something else and even nothing if I can get that far.
Actually all along, it wasn’t really any..thing until it got processed by them in the past and in the moment of now has become some..thing significant.

Right here and right now (AKA ‘the present’ , which is both Immeasurably small and infinitely large at the same time)  ‘Nothing’ is going on .
Nothing is everything everywhere until we fix it as something at point in time.

Is there something bothering you from your past?

My advice:
leave it alone. Treat it as nothing and enjoy your journey

Help others create better things or no..thing at all out of their somethings


Wednesday, 31 July 2013

A social aptitude not to weight for the juice of life

I was aboard a Virgin Atlantic flight about 2 years ago and I saw the Jawbone UP in the in-flight brochure.

“£120! That's a lot of money for a bangle!” , I thought

What an UP was, simply didn’t register in my mind.

Sick Athleticism by a Basket Case

I was diagnosed as an athlete 20 years ago, which totally surprised me! However, I did take great pleasure in producing a print-out from St Thomas’ Hospital to show my Basketball teammates, who were half my age.
Every time they made a wise crack about my age, out would come the report and I would openly gloat “cos I’m an athlete, you know” .

The Weight of Cholesterol

I retired from my active Basketball participation in 1998 and if I was honest, I have proceeded  to get sick ever since.
20 years ago I was diagnosed with Hypercholesterolemia, which was why I attending St Thomas’ Hospital.

By July 1st, this year, my weight had climbed in excess of 252lbs but my cholesterol level remained static at around 11.


Some time back I decided to quit the Statins and all the other drugs that had been prescribed to fix my Cholesterol and I am glad I did!

Last year the film ‘Statin Nation’ was released, which refutes that Cholesterol is the killer that it is reported to be and that “People with high cholesterol tend to live longer” . Statin NationThe purpose of Cholesterol it seems is to repair damage to arteries, Cholesterol is not the problem, it is a symptom of something else and the wrong thing is being treated.

Not even being aware of that, for me it was a life choice:
“Is my life going to be about taking drugs?”.
It was a Brain Space thing.
I consider my present time and where I put my thoughts as precious, even more than my own longevity. 
Worrying about taking prescribed medications wasn’t doing it for me.

As my weight grew so did my blood pressure. It was high!

Walking up slopes for any amount of time produced tightness in my chest, I wasAngela aware of pains in my shoulders, tingling hands and even my teeth experienced strange sensations!

Last year my friend , Jason Jackman, referred to me to Superwellness  Nutritionist Coach, Angela Steel and my education began. Sweet!


Its everywhere! from bread to Coca Cola, from ice-cream to ketchup, from hot-dog to cakes, jams, sweets, sausages, yogurts ... you name it!
In virtually everything I ate.

Great, as an athlete, I would burn it but as a Laptop Jockey ………. No

Research is reporting that the excess sugars in our diet are responsible for a variety of ailments, such as colds, flu, food allergies, high cholesterol, candida, cancer, diabetes, fatty degeneration, degenerative diseases, depression, dizziness, crying spells, aggression, insomnia, weakness, skin problems, heart and circulatory diseases... 

2013-04-20 12.05.48My eating habits changed and I discovered just how enjoyable AND SATISFYING some foods really are, yet alone how they repair my body!
Organic oats for breakfast with Strawberries and Blueberries and half a banana – even though the banana has natural sugar, it still has sugar!

Snacks of Almonds or Munchy Seeds – new sensations, new tastes – its all new experience and its fun!

This year, I re-mortgaged my house and a medical report was required by the insurance company. Blood tests were taken and submitted to my Doctor and off I went to see him.
My visits to the doctor occur about every 10 years.

He said “your Cholesterol level is 11”, I said “that’s good for me”.
We discussed how to lower it and given my decision not to take drugs, I asked what the alternatives were, expecting him to talk to me about food or alternative therapies.  Instead I was offered alterative drugs.

Strangely enough, the high blood pressure had disappeared and 2 weeks later, just by being aware, my cholesterol was down to 9.6 but I am a hypnotherapist


Some weeks later, I met a client in Westfield Mall, in London’s East End, next to the Olympic Park. In the Apple Store I came across the Jawbone Up again – “why would the Apple Store stock a bangle?”

upThe UP wristband tracks the amount of steps that I take and sleep states, deep and shallow. I then plug it into my Android phone and it uploads its data to the UP app.

I use to push other data to the UP from many sources:
YouTube, Foursquare, my Wordpress Blog, Flickr, the weather at the beginning of the day and at 3pm and scrobbles from Last.FM
It is like a life journal.

I also push data from the UP app to Facebook, Google Docs and Google Calendar.

But Weight!


I then discovered the Withings Smart Body Analyser (scales) which feeds my weight, Body fat measurement, CO2 readings from where I sleep and my heart rate thru WiFi to its app and from there to most of the other Life-style apps that I now use.ifttt

If any of the apps don't redistribute data to other apps, then usually can.

The TEMPRunkeeper app measures my steps, tracks me by GPS and tells me (in a female voice) how I am progressing as I walk. She tells me about my pace and speed. Runkeeper is another app installed on my smartphone too.

All that remained was to monitor my heart rate on a continuous basis and upload that data to my phone and there I hit a problem!

According to Polar, in the UK, Polar Bluetooth Heart Rate Monitors don’t work with my Samsung S3! In point of fact nothing seemed to work the way I wanted but if I owned an iPhone, I would have been spoilt for choice.
I think that is pretty backward!

tempEventually, I bought a Garmin Forerunner 110. Although this doesn't transfer data by Bluetooth or WiFi, it connects via a USB directly to my laptop and using Runkeeper,com, I can upload a map of where I walk, the elevation, my pace etc. etc., as well as to Garmin Connect  which records the same data and keeps a record of my activity on its own calendar.
Garmin also has an app for my phone.

The calendar can be added to my Google Calendar but so far I haven’t been able to make that work,

Next thing up was the  Joe Cross documentary on Channel 5, here in the UK:

'Fat, Sick & Nearly Dead' ( click here to see the  Official Trailer from Team Reboot Sageon Vimeo )

So I bought the same Juicer, as he uses in the programme.

then I needed to measure the acid in my blood and that where it becomes lo-tech.
I ordered Simplex Health pH Test Strips from Amazon and add the results onto a Google spread-sheet


The great thing is that I dropped 10lbs in a week.
I feel so great and its getting better each day!
And everything is broadcastable through Facebook and Twitter and on Runkeeper’s own  Social stream – that’s quite an incentive!

Becoming accountable to my network and I even have one of my clients monitor me, which she does admirably!

So, the Universe conspired to get me well.
I got aware and I have had a fun time playing with gadgets and apps and being a ‘Social Tart’, enjoying reporting the progress in SoMe and all this while I heal …. Fabulous!


Become aware. Take responsibility for your own health and your diet. Don’t delegate and
Be well!


Friday, 12 July 2013

Spaced Out Unintended Arrogance?

I met up with a client yesterday. She was at the appointed spot ahead of time but the interesting thing was that I knew she was there five minutes before I arrived.  I just felt her presence.

As I exited Waterloo Station and headed  towards ‘The Southbank’ a conversation started in my head about people who are always late.

I remember watching a Dr Phil show where he was discussing the subject of  Continual I Like what yiu are doing with your hairLateness. One guy was talking about how he even gets up “10 minutes earlier to make sure that I am not late and I am still late!”
Dr Phil responded along the lines of “You are always late because you are arrogant”. I thought that interesting and I understand it but what occurred to me yesterday is that Fear may have the greater part to play in it.

Arrogance is the result of Fear. Maybe that is my assumption but I trust my gut so I know it is true.

I had a friend who asked me help her with her preparations for a significant court appearance. I was to meet her at a law practice at a given time and every occasion she was late – very late! AND there was always a justifiable reason. (But the law of averages tell you that is not possible)
Even when it came to the big day, she arrived  90 minutes late. Was that arrogance or was she confronted?

Clearly these are programmes that we run, we develop routines and habits to support how we manage time and commitments.

I have another friend who is always ahead of time. I like that. He, much as my client yesterday,  has gifted me with  time to spare.
Its also great because it is one less thing to be concerned about, by which I mean, one less thing to process and …

…. I love having space in my brain , I value it!

Brain Space

I don’t like having others take up my brain space, without my permission.
For me, having Brain Space is more space in which I can create and have great thoughts.

Thoughts are the real juice of life. They are the proof that we are alive. The source of our conscious reality. The source of pleasure and pain.

Byron Katie is one lady in particular who is a pleasure to watch whilst she thinks. You see it happen and you see the pleasure and it exudes from her and I get it!
That’s a gift!

So I guess compassion is the order of the day.
When people are continually late, they are probably fearful and may be avoiding or hiding it. They are probably less organised and that caused by lack of brain space
they may be blatantly arrogant and that takes planning AND BRAIN SPACE

My friend lost her appeal, by the way. I guess that was lack of space.

Reality exists in time and space – How we use time and where we use it creates our reality be it Pleasurable or Painful.

Catcha! I’m off to think pleasurable thoughts, Just gotta get me some space.



Images Southbank: 
Dr Phil: Various

Tuesday, 9 July 2013

Build a Good Practice practice practice

I was recently asked “How do I Build a Good Practice?” by two new comers to coaching. I answered Practice, practice, practice and more practice and at every level.
In other words practice all the time until it becomes unconscious so that you just BE a practitioner and what you practice just occurs whenever and wherever it is needed. Whatever your practice!

I sign up to many discussion groups and forums and online communities related to my practices. But I seem to come across one particular problem: Many contributors desire to prove that they know their subject and maybe, even worse, try to sell something based on that.
I understand the desire to exchange ideas but the problem is that the activity of practice and the learnings from practising, need to be taking place directly with people. Either face to face or one to one by phone or VOIP, rather than indirectly via a keyboard or keypad.

Learn by practising Being a practitioner is not about knowing techniques. It is about when and where. Unconsciously use the right technique that is needed and more importantly, take that technique and modifying it to match the needs of your client. True practitioners do not need to think what to apply and when. They just know what to do and when to do it. What to do if what they are doing is not working. How to switch and what to switch to…. and there is the point.

That takes practice.

When I mentor practitioners. One particular question often arises. How much should I charge?

 iStock_000019459622XSmallPRACTICE Scrabble TilesHere is an example of a typical conversation:

Practitioner “I am thinking of doing a weight loss programme”

Mentor Great! How many people, what format are you using, where, etc…?

Practitioner Oh, it’s for 10 people and …….……

Mentor How much are you charging?

Practitioner Oh, I am not charging. I need the practice.

Mentor You are a practitioner, that’s your job. You are there to practice.
You are not practicing to become something, you should continually practice to continue as a practitioner. A valuable practitioner


Actually, I believe that this should go one stage further. You need to practice so that you Become a valuable Servant.

What you charge should be based on a combination of the value to the client and what the client can afford.
I go as far to ask my clients what they are going to pay me.  And, having described what I am going to do, I will ask “How valuable would that be to you?”

The question is deliberate. It gives me a clue as to how the client values themself. The answer indicates what type of work and the amount of work that I will need to do.

Many practitioners price themselves too cheaply because they want to make their services available to as many people as possible. This is admirable. We are here to make a difference, to make people’s lot better BUT this is misplaced. It should not be about what the practitioner is charging, rather a combination of the value to the client and what the client can afford.
It is about the client, not the practitioner, which means everybody pays an appropriate price and in some cases the price is nothing!

If you undercharge some people they will perceive that your practice isn’t worth much and they won’t engage. If you overcharge others they will not engage either.
If your desire is to make you service easily available, charging the right amount is important.

Do not serve too many clients at one time.
That's right! Turn business down
You have to be fit to serve so conserving your energy is paramount.

If you wish to offer your services free then make money first from those that will pay you before you offer your services free of charge to those that cannot afford you
Only offer your services free of charge once you can afford to do so and always do your best work whether you are being paid or not.

Offering services free of charge to build up a reputation, rarely works. Practitioners can end up struggling and then can’t afford to market themselves. By all means offer samples of your work BUT....
No dough, no go!

If you need to practice something new you can offer free consultation via classified advertising sites like and explain why you are asking for free clients. You can also advertise in the local press.

As far as I am concerned the purpose, whatever you practice, should be that
You are there to serve.

  • Practice all the time
  • Practice one to one
  • Learn by practising
  • Learn when and where
  • BE a practitioner.
  • Be valuable
  • Be a valuable servant
  • Ask “How valuable would that be to you?”
  • Charge for the value that the client expects
  • Turn business down
  • Improve people’s lot
  • Offer your services for free occasionally
  • Always do your best work!
  • No dough, no go!
  • Serve.

Friday, 5 July 2013

A Schizophrenic Way of Life?

In reaction to a Facebook posting, I was asked my view on “How one company is trying to buy up Mother Earth”. The link doesn’t appear to contain the same words - Go Figure

OK, I am a big picture guy.

We are amidst a social revolution, clearly!
People are using Social Media and the Internet to affect change like never before and the results are being seen by the amount of people on the streets protesting throughout the world.

My friend said to me the other day that the Brits would be on the streets if it were not for Beer and Football and amusing as it was, I can see his reasoning and it’s a true generalisation.

‘Thems that have’ appear to be in a last ditch attempt to maintain control and the reactions are showing up all over the internet. Perceived injustices are showing up like never before! The velocity of communication has never been at the speed of light before available to so many people.

Perception is on high alert and emotional reaction the same whereas time taken to research is probably not being undertaken at a personal level, rather digital ‘hear-say’ is!
Isn’t that the same velocity working against itself?

Avaaz is part of the reaction of ordinary folk to maintain freedom (freedom is an illusion and actually always has been an illusion).
Brits have freedom to a point and believe that they are free because they are comfortable with their lot, when actually most are held in place by fears of losing something because they noticed they have already started losing stuff.
But the Brits probably have the highest level of freedom available in the world. Hence our massive immigration population. People like the freedoms we have.

My personal belief:
Protestation doesn’t work as much as we think it does, community and negotiated agreements always delivers but without the protestation then issues are veiled from us.

There is a place and a time (reality) for all behaviour but it needs to be powerful not forceful.

Osho said:

osho910[1]"Everybody wants freedom as far as talking is concerned, but nobody really is free and nobody really wants to be free, because freedom brings responsibility. It does not come alone. And to be dependent is simple: the responsibility is not on you, the responsibility is on the person you are dependent on.

So people have made a schizophrenic way of life. They talk about truth, they talk about freedom, and they live in lies, they live in slaveries – slaveries of many kinds, because each slavery frees you from some responsibility. A man who really wants to be free has to accept immense responsibilities. He cannot dump his responsibilities on anybody else. Whatever he does, whatever he is, he is responsible."

Humans have such a bad track record of self-abuse, like no other animal on this planet and the constant need to separate and use is bazaar. The concept of retribution is also bazaar.
Who are we fearful of? who are we controlling? who are we stealing from?,  who are we fighting? Who are we punishing? … Ourselves – That’s bazaar!

It is community and agreement (enrolment via conversation) that will change things, always has, always will and that’s the power of humanity.
Not forceful action or forceful opinion, rather great questions.

Social Media is a conversation. It needs to generate creativity and enrolment.

Perhaps I am Socratic but I believe Questions have more power than answers because it is creativity that drives humanity not fixing things – that is containment. It is not freedom.



“Freedom is everything and love is all the rest” ~ Dr. Richard Bandler and Owen Fitzpatrick



Owen Fitzpatrick and AyPee at NLP Masterclass

Content: and

Wednesday, 3 July 2013

Turn on, tune in, and drop out

“My advice to people today is as follows: if you take the game of life seriously, if you take your nervous system seriously, if you take your sense organs seriously, if you take the energy process seriously, you must turn on, tune in, and drop out”

~ Timothy Leary

probably the most famous thing that Timothy Leary said.


Timothy Francis Leary - born October 6th, 1920 died May 31st, 1996

Leary was an American psychologist who advocated the use of psychedelic drugs when they were both available and could be used legally. He conducted experiments at Harvard University in the 60’s together with Richard Alpert and I remember reading about his experiments in The Sunday Times supplement at the time

He believed  that the drugs had potential use in psychiatry and he developed the eight-circuit model of consciousness, which is presented  in his 1977 book Exo-Psychology.

Richard Nixon once described Leary as "the most dangerous man in America"
….. Hmm.. ……. Interesting observation   Smile

Alpert travelled to India in 1967 where he met Neem Karoli Baba, who gave him the name "Ram Dass", meaning "servant of God"
Dass is now a considered contemporary spiritual teacher


Sources: Quote: Images Google Detail Wikipedia and

Friday, 28 June 2013

MAGIC! Have a #Rocking_Day !


I was having a bit of rant on FB this morning and I thought B*** IT!
Yes why not?
Blog it!

I have the privilege of sharing what I think with the world in so many ways now and I own (not mine really, more generously given to me by Wordpress) a blog.

I was taken by a picture of a child eating crumbs from the floor and so I decided to post it every day, this week and just ask a question each day.
The first publication included the question: “Why?”
Today’s question is “Invisible?”

Each day the responses have grown and each day there is more passion being expressed by those that have responded.

As the world occurs to me right now:
WE are way, way out of balance!

The divide between the ‘have’ and the ‘have nots’ has never been greater and a massive breakdown is going to occur so we can achieve a very much needed break-though.


Arthur Partridge #StartRant
Yes the vulnerable take the brunt and the most vulnerable (those that can do the least about it) take most of the brunt.
tempThere is enough resource in this world to stop this but it seems that humans have to HOLD ONTO resources for their own survival. Even though sharing resources grows resources.
So survival requires sharing but that depends on just how vulnerable you are.
Meaning, in the current model, if you have nothing to trade, then you are nothing and shouldn't be here
Great model, ugh?
Be proud Humanity. You have come a long way

Am I wrong?

Tuesday, 25 June 2013


Behave yourselves
(Its all a question of imagination)

iStock_000009165312_ExtraSmallBehave yourselves and do what you are told!
As a child you may had heard that at school or home or both.

I am finding more and more that I am using the ‘BeSayDoHave’ model on clients, and friends, who are stopped or confused about where they are in their lives.
That seems to be the common theme in life right now OR it just occurs to me that way.

There is a certain directionless in people’s lives.
I think because they are buying into the recession thing and the pointlessness they believe as a result.

Actually, never before have we had so much opportunity to imagine and create!

But we are certainly in transition.
Social Media is causing and assisting that big time.
We are amidst a Social Revolution which is bringing all sorts of authority under scrutiny and conspirisists are having an open run at most every known and unknown event of the past zillion years.

Perhaps it is that governments and corporations are disempowered as a result and the feeling of lost-ness and leaderless-ness is showing up

The ‘Be Say Do Have’ Model

The model follows the state of unconscious into unconsciousness and back out again.

BEing requires no consciousness – one just is just feeling or just being in a state for no reason.
When we get to SAY something about that we become conscious of our state which will probably cause us to
DO something (consciously or unconsciously)
thus causing us to HAVE something. (again consciously or unconsciously).

States of Concern

Most states of concern are so practiced (repeated time and time again) they run automatically and become unconsciously executed.

But let’s look more closely at the model:

As a child we were always imagining BEing something and telling (SAYing) others about  it and then DOing things and HAVing experiences before moving on to the next BeSayDoHave cycle = Playing.

If we didn't HAVE the result we imagined we probably threw a tantrum or got upset until it was forgotten and then we started the whole BeSayDoHave cycle off again.

Going then into the next stage of our development (??) of entering education, we also enter an environment where the chances are that we need to be controlled.
What we BE and SAY become casualties because there is a need for us to DO and HAVE things so that we comply with the rules.

You can’t have 30 Kids BEing and SAYing things all at one time. Chaos will follow and control will be lost.

In point of fact Self Control was being installed in us and not all of us can do that.

The Short Circuit and Getting Stuck

What I come across are people who have gone through the system and arrived in a future where unconsciously they are under great (self-)pressure to DO something to change how they are (BE) feeling and the short cycle of DoHave is constantly being run without achieving the desired result.

They believe that to HAVE change that they need to DO and haven’t yet found out what it is. They need to do something or are having trouble deciding something.
They have forgotten to BE and SAY what it is that has come to them unconsciously.

In the DoHave cycle there is very little room for unconscious imagination and people constantly come up short.

Choice, Not Decisions

Adding BeSay back into the equation increases scope and depth and most importantly choice!
Things become unstuck
and the pressing need for decision goes away.


if it doesn't work out throw a tantrum in your head and start a new cycle.


Sunday, 23 June 2013


but true?

"Those that make you believe absurdities can make you commit atrocities"

~ Voltaire


François-Marie Arouet, known by his nom de plume Voltaire, was a French Enlightenment writer, historian and philosopher famous for his wit, his attacks on the established Catholic Church, and his ... Wikipedia

Born: November 21, 1694, Paris, France
Died: May 30, 1778, Paris, France
Education: Lycée Louis-le-Grand (1704–1711)
Buried: Panthéon, Paris, France

Sources and Google

Friday, 14 June 2013

Successful Men

imageA man is a success if he gets up in the morning and gets to bed at night, and in between he does what he wants to do

~ Bob Dylan

Born Robert Allen Zimmerman May 24, 1941, Duluth, Minnesota, United States
Images care of

Sunday, 9 June 2013

I Died...and it's all good

Conversation on Facebook with my friend Jacket Backman.

It is amazing what you find out about people through Social Networking

206847_10150157262617607_7389010_nArthur Partridge seems I'll be meeting that goal date!! Book design complete, uploading files now. And for all of you curious to hear more here's the copy from the back of the book:

"8 years ago I died. I was home when it happened, recovering from a fairly standard medical procedure, one that had gone very wrong.
From the onset of the massive bleeding, to making my own 911 call, I share my horrifying and bloody wait for the paramedics to arrive and what it was like leaving my young sons behind while I made the trip to the hospital. Learn how I lost my battle with consciousness and emerged into the most outstanding, magnificently, unconditionally loving experience of my life.

Journey with me as I share with you a place far beyond your imagination. I take you each step of the way all the while so acutely aware of my connection with our source. I share with you some of the insights and understanding I gained about our human condition and our purpose beyond.

And finally I describe my experience of being given the option of whether I will return to my body or remain in the afterlife, because even in dying it seems, we still have choices to make..."

I'm doing a book launch August 2nd in Malta and getting all the pieces together to make it happen on time has been character building... I'm close, very, very close.

What stories can you tell of great people you meet on line?

Thursday, 3 January 2013

Don’t resolve. Evolve! Why New Years Resolutions fail

 Be(-say-do-)have Yourself!

If you are (Being) different, chances are you will Say something different that will have you Do something different so that you can Have something different.

I am delighted that John La Valle has allowed me to post the article below from his monthly newsletter for ‘The Society of Neuro Linguistic Programming’ Practitioners and Trainers’.

John is the President of the society of NLP

It fascinates me how people are steered and even stuck, by the words they use in grammatical structures that they, themselves, chose!

Their own language gets in their way!
structured to impede - structured for failure

When coaching, I aim to move the client’s reasoning out of the way.

I indirectly challenge the accuracy of their memories,
increase the amount of words that I use to describe their issue and then
agree with them a new way to summarise their issue.

The greater choice of words used in better grammatical structures, the greater the possibility. Behaviour changes, the foundation is established and the work can begin.
Just my personal preference.

In his article John explains how nominalisations impact us and he offers a way out of the trap.

I believe that Nominalisation is the most damaging aspect of all people’s stories. I describe it as  the knock out punch that renders them unconscious.

I just had to ask John if I could post his article and he agreed.
Over to John:



I WROTE MOST OF this a few years ago at this time and have decided to rewrite it, add a little here and there because of its popularity.

WHAT IS IT THAT has people "make" New Year Resolutions and then "break" them? We have a local pub here that has a "Break Your New Year's Resolutions Early - Why Wait?" party on December 30 each year. It kind of adds something to the ritual.

THE WORD *RESOLUTION* itself is a nominalization, a verb formed into a noun. It comes from the word "resolve", which means to solve, again!! And so many people get into a pattern of re-solving old problems and then not re-solving them because they then turn the process into an event, a static event. How about EVOLUTIONS?!! Evolving continuously, doing new things, get a new look, a new walk, a new talk, a new anything!!

INSTEAD OF MAKING "Resolutions", how about setting up new directions in which you want to be going this coming year, both personally and professionally? Now is the time to invest in yourself! The future economic predictions are that those most skilled, most savvy, most knowledgeable, are to be in the lead! The smart ones are making investments now, even in themselves!

TAKE SOME GOALS, activities, behaviours that you want to be doing, and see yourself doing those in your future, just starting in the next few moments. If you're going to put those pictures into your future, be sure they're of behaviours - YOURS - that's you doing them, dissociate so you can see yourself doing them, then associate so you'll know what you'll be seeing, hearing, feeling, smelling, tasting. Then dissociate, see yourself doing them!! It's in your language, too.

REMEMBER, IT'S ONE THING to have goals that are outside of yourself, like that red *Testosterosa*, but without the behaviours, you may not know how to go about getting one, or even earning the money to get one. Remember to keep YOUR goals behaviour-driven. That material thing is just the outcome of the outcome, it's the reward for doing certain behaviours!!

And Have A Great 2013! and Beyond!

©2013 John La Valle